Road to Breezehome
by Stuart James
Summary: Lydia has been summoned to Dragonsreach, she is to be housecarl to an adventurer who has found favour with Whiterun's court. She hopes this is the chance to make some coin and make her dreams a reality.
1. Chapter 1

Lydia enters through the large gates to Whiterun town, returning to the court of Dragonsreach. She's just wearing simple peasant garb, a dress with laces at the chest, slightly open from the walk, her Nord heritage making her not feel the cold as much as most. The guard standing at the rampart's stairway straightens up when her sees her.

"You look tired, friend. Speak to Hulda at the Bannered Mare..." he recites in his thick Nord accent.

"Ivan? It's me, Lydia. You know it's me. I come through here nearly every day."

"Yea... but... I likes to keep it up and anyways, the Jarl's insisted. So when it's actually someone visiting, we got our patter down. And anyways... it's always nice talking to _you_, Lydia."

"Hmm." Lydia says, unable to see his eyes properly due to his masked helmet but she's pretty sure where he's looking then she folds her arms to protect her modesty.

"Anyway, Lyd. What's going on today?"

"Jarl wants to see me. Something about being made housecarl to some adventurer. Make a nice change to get out there for some adventure, maybe make some coin."

"I used to be an adventurer like you then..."

"No you didn't, Ivan."

"Sorry. It's just one of the visitor lines we have to say, you know, start friendly conversation and the like?"

"Hm. Yea. I know. But Veronica started that particular one."

"Yea. The Jarls all liked it, so it went into the rotation of greetings."

"At least Veronica did actually used to be an adventurer, but that arrow line? I reckon she was making that up, just so she could go on light duties."

"Veronica's nice..."

"Ugh, see you later, Ivan."

"Kinsman."

"Woman. I thought you'd noticed that already but... whatever!"

Lydia continues on her way, stopping briefly when she reaches Breezehome, a small but pleasant house yet to be occupied in the city. She places her hand on the large wooden front door, feeling its grain.

"If I get some coin from all this? You're mine, Breezehome." she gives the door a little tap with her palm then continues on towards the market, taking the scenic route. To have a home of her own would be wonderful to Lydia, currently having had to rely on the Jarl for a bed at Dragonsreach. Having a bed at Dragonsreach is much better than a lot of the folk in Skyrim have to endure in this harsh region but she would still like a space to call her own.

She passes through the market, the same old faces selling the same old wares. Prior to taking up the life of a warrior, Lydia had considered the life of the merchant, the coin being the allure but she wasn't so sure it would be exciting enough for her. Not that she's had much excitement in the last few years. After leaving the Legion, Lydia had wanted to return to her home of Skyrim and was lucky enough to have joined the court of Jarl Baalgruf; he welcomed a hardened Legionary to act as one of his protectors. Though there's little for her to do when he has his own personal housecarl, Irileth, a strong and powerful Dunmer warrior he has known for a long time. With his wife long dead, Lydia had wondered if the bonds between the Jarl and Irileth were stronger than the court should know but aware it is best not to gossip.

"Hey, Lydia!" Ysolda calls over.

"Hi, Ysolda! How's the business venture going? Any closer to buying up the Bannered Mare?"

"Not really... but I took your advice and spoke with the Khajiit. They said they'll trade with me and show me the ropes, but I need a mammoth tusk to get the ball rolling."

"Well don't look at me! Have you seen the size of those things?"

"Oh. No. I wasn't suggesting you go and get one for me. Just... they're so expensive. It'd clear me out and well... I can't take the chance as much faith as I have in the cat people. Hopefully I'll get the sleeping tree sap from Ulag, that'd really get things going then."

"May the Nine guide you well. See you around, Ysolda."

"See you, Lyd."

Lydia makes her way up the large stone stairs up to the Wind District and past the sad, old looking Gildergreen tree. A few townsfolk and visiting adventurers are seated on the benches around the tree.

"It's a shame isn't it?" the Priestess of Kynareth, Danica, says at her, as though continuing on from some imaginary conversation.

"Sorry, are you speaking to me?" Lydia has to ask, the randomness of the question catching her off-guard.

"The Gildergreen, it's a shame." Danica continues.

"Ummm... yes, I suppose it is."

"It was planted in the... oh... rude woman!"

Lydia has already continued on her way, looking up to Jorrvaskr, home of the warrior clan, the Companions. She had considered joining the Companions but they seem too full of themselves, overly-confident and brash, particularly Aela, who for some reason grates on her. But Lydia is a housecarl now and that will bring its own adventures. She hopes at least anyway. Lydia hopes that she has not been assigned to some milk-drinker of a lord with shining armour and a weapon that has never been unsheathed.

On Lydia continues to the final leg of steps, up to the castle of Dragonsreach itself. Nazeem, the effeminate well-to-do Redguard, passes her on the stairs, no doubt coming from another session of cringing and fawning to the Jarl.

"Lydia. How nice to see you. Are you well?" he says, with his typical veiled snear.

"Nazeem. Fine, thanks." she acknowledges but doesn't stop for pleasantries.

The guard at the top of the stairs clears his throat,"You look tired, friend. You see..."

"Gah! Do you guys have to? I've just had this with Ivan."

"Oh... sorry, Lyd. Jarl's orders. Where was I? Oh, yea. You look tired, friend. You see Hulda at the... hey! I hadn't finished!"

Lydia wonders if she should have a complex that the guards keep stating her tired look. She hopes it's just the banter that the Jarls have enforced on the guards rather than her age showing. Life is hard in Skyrim and weathered faces happen to the youngest of souls but Lydia, so she thinks, has kept a relatively youthful complexion, something she is proud of.

She opens one of the huge doors that front the castle and enters.

"Heard about your honeyed words..."

"What? What's that one now? Gah, how did that get into the rotation?"

"Sorry, Lyd."

"Ugh, never mind."

Though Lydia is a little more impressed that this one was actually somewhat flattering. She waits in the large greeting area, the Jarl speaking with his court and a stranger she hasn't seen before. The stranger wears a swirling patterned black cloak with hood so she can't see who her potential new master is. Their business seemingly concluded the figure moves towards the doors and Lydia. The Jarl stands and gesticulates to Lydia this is indeed who she will serve.

Lydia prepares herself. She has studied the role of the housecarl and clears her throat in preparation for their first meeting.

"The Jarl has appointed me as your housecarl. It's an honour to..."

"Yes, he informed me. I am Luxuria, wizard and sometimes more... So what do you do?" this person says with a hissing voice but quite human, Lydia barely able to see her face due to the hood.

"The Jarl has recognised you as a person of great importance in the hold. A hero."

"Hm. Well. Don't be so officious in future. I have no need of you right now. And get some armour. You look pathetic."

And her mistress moves towards the door.

"I do have steel armour but... I was... Oh... er... okay... 'bye then! I'll be back here if you have need of... oh..."

Luxuria is gone.

Lydia stands a moment, unsure what just happened and stunned by her charge's short and dismissive tone. She hopes it wasn't something she said, she doesn't think she said anything to offend but Lydia wants the opportunity to get out there, see the darker areas of Skyrim and the wealth that might lie within, and finally, hopefully, find her own home in Whiterun. Eventually, Lydia walks up the stairs to the court and sits alone at one of the long tables, a little deflated by her experience.

"Not going with the Dragonborn, Lyd?" a guard asks.

"No." the disappointment present in her voice. "Apparently, she 'has no need of me right now'."

"I wouldn't worry. From what I just heard, she'll be heading to High Hrothgar and the Greybeards to make sense of all that stuff that happened over by the western tower. I'm sure there'll be plenty of opportunity to make some coin."

"High Hrothgar? But... I've always wanted to walk the seven thousand steps! Gah! This day gets better and better."

"I'm going to the Bannered Mare after my rotation, Lyd."

"Oh. That's nice." Lydia responds, uninterested and already in thought about her curious meeting.

"Wanna come? We can get real drunk and..."

"Not today, Igor, thanks."

There is a moment of silence, apart from just the crackle of the large central fire.

"Need a weapon? You see..."

"Agh! By the Nine, do you people _never _just shut the hell up?"

"Eight."

"What?"

"By the Eight. And you better watch that, Lyd. I'd hate to see a beauty like you end up in the dungeon."

"Don't any of you guards have spouses?"

"Aw, Lydia! Don't be like that! You can't blame an old guard for appreciating a pretty girl. Your skin looks as soft as the fresh snow of Dawnstar."

"Hm. Go on..."


	2. Chapter 2

"What you got?" Lydia asks.

"Bread, cheese, tomato. You know, the usual."

"Ploughman's lunch, eh?"

"Hm. Yea, I suppose it is." Ysolda responds, her meal seeming even less exotic than it was before.

"Bit lively in here this evening?"

"Yea. They've been here most of the afternoon, I reckon. Even old Brennuin took the knock earlier but he seems to be back on form."

"Play it! Play it!" the men all eagerly shout at Mikael, but Ulfberth the blacksmith seems the most eager for him to play a particular song.

"A little early for that, isn't it, fellas?" Mikael responds with his well practised charm but already getting his fingers into position on the instrument for it, gently strumming the opening chord.

"No!" Hulda shouts at them all. "I don't want that filth polluting the air!"

"It's just a little fun, Hulda, my dear. Maybe I should even add a verse for you..." Mikael attempts to woo her.

"Don't even... gah!" Hulda shows her exasperation that she is no doubt going to be ignored and returns behind the bar in a fluster.

Mikael plays out a shanty and the men begin to sway, raising their mugs and cheering for the best bits when he commences his song. Carlotta has already ushered the young ears she is mother to away and out of the tavern.

___"Oh I know a girl,  
____She'll give you a twirl,  
____Just pass her a little coin._

___Lovely and round,  
____So few to the pound,  
____Ripe to purloin.____  
_

___I don't 'bout you,  
____But when there are two,  
____Proud and exposed.____  
_

___I just can't resist,  
____Those lovely, big tits,  
____Nature's warmer for the nose!____  
_

Come on fellas!" Mikael encourages the crowd to join the chorus which they do, and with some gusto.

"___Busty! Lusty!  
____Ever so slightly rude!  
____Easy! Squeezy!  
____The girls of Solitude!_"___  
_

There is a musical interlude while the next verse comes around.

"Not the next one! She's a lovely girl, now stop it!" Hulda attempts but to no avail as Mikael continues under the encouragement of the crowd.

"___Now there is a tale,  
____A worthy female,  
____Lisette, she's a breeze.____  
_

___Complexion so fair,  
____Song voice that's so rare,  
____Her mouth knows how to please.____  
_

___But best on her knees,  
____On soft thighs like trees,  
____Giving it all she's got.____  
_

___Believe you me, you'll see  
____By the Nine, what you'll see!  
____She can take the lot!"____  
_

The rowdy chorus continues and Hulda pours herself a large mug of spiced wine.

"___Busty! Lusty!  
____Ever so slightly rude!  
____Easy! Squeezy!  
____The girls of Solitude!_"___  
_

Hulda slams down her mug, the wine splashing out over the rim.

"Not the last one, it's... disgusting!" then she downs the remainder of the drink in one.

"___Now royalty beckons,  
____And now that I reckons,  
____There's one at the Palace, Blue.____  
_

___Erdi, court maid,  
____No doubt underpaid,  
____The things she could do for you.____  
_

___So offer her coin,  
____I reckon she'll join,  
____In most activities.____  
_

___But best on her back,  
____Showing her crack,  
____As she parts her gorgeous knees."____  
_

"Filthy beasts!" Hulda shouts at them as there is a flurry of cheers and lurid noises.

"___Busty! Lusty!  
____Ever so slightly rude!  
____Easy! Squeezy!  
____The girls of Solitude!____  
_

One more time!

___Busty! Lusty!  
____Ever so slightly rude!  
____Easy! Squeezy!  
____The girls of Solitude!____  
_

___They're the girls of Solitude!"_

The men all cheer the end of the song and clap for the bard, who takes his plaudits with a flourish of bows.

"Waheeeeeeeeeeey!" Brennuin shouts as he is caught from falling in the fire by Ulfberth, who then proceeds to fling the little man to one side, sometimes unaware of how much strength he carries from years of smithing. He wasn't unaware this time though.

"Wasn't so bad." Lydia says to Ysolda once the noise has settled.

"He's the most amazing bard I've ever heard." Ysolda gushes.

"Really? Hm. Takes all sorts I suppose. Maybe he should do a verse on you, eh?"

"You think he would?!" she replies, not only thinking Lydia was serious but that it would be a good thing in the first place.

"You're a strange girl, Izzy. Hey! Saadia! Can I get a mead here today or what?"


	3. Chapter 3

The morning comes and Lydia sits at a long table in the Dragonsreach court, laying her head on an arm. While it wasn't one of _those _nights, she certainly had her fair share of mead. Lydia and Ysolda drank 'til the small hours, being the last to leave and allowing Hulda at least some rest. Her head feels heavy and tender, a slight empty feeling in her stomach and the dull throb of the previous night's alcohol across her whole being. She hears the large front door slam shut and lifts her heavy head to see Luxuria coming. Lydia sits up properly, causing her to feel a little queasy then gives her dutiful honours to her thane.

"I am your sword... and... your shield..."

Luxuria walks straight past her and to the steward. They have a brief exchange then she returns to Lydia.

"With me." Luxuria says, then turns and walks to the doors.

Lydia quickly follows but is still perturbed by this woman's shortness.

"Where are we going?"

"Home." she says.

"Oh, you have a house?"

"Yes. I do now. Come."

Luxuria marches ahead quickly with quite a pace to her walk. Lydia feels like a pet chasing after her mistress but hopes that the townsfolk don't see this in her. They walk through the town until Luxuria stops at Breezehome and uses the key to open the front door.

"This is your new home?" she says, gutted that her chance for this home has gone.

"Yes. Come."

They enter but it is quite dusty and there is little décor to speak of.

"Hm. I'll see that bald Breton. Insist he does something about all this. In the meantime, take these."

She hands Lydia a large sack of items that didn't look like if would fit under her cloak but it must have come from there.

"I am sworn to carry your burdens." Lydia says, quoting from the housecarl instuctions.

"What? What are you saying now? What did I say about being officious? Just... never mind. Oh. And there's some armour in there. Better than that 'steel' shite. I have to go again."

Luxuria leaves without a further word.

"Okay then, 'bye!" she says sarcastically. "Aaah... crap!"

She looks around at this place and begins to tidy it up a little, removing the cobwebs and starting a fire, then it occurs to her.

"What if I need to go out? I don't have a key! By the Nine!"

She looks through the sack of items.

"Ooooh, Ebony armour. Nice. What else do we have...? What the...? What's she going to do with all this crap? Dragon bones?! She's got dragon bones?! And dragon scales?! She's been slaying dragons and she didn't bring me. Awww!"

* * *

Lydia paces up and down in the house in her new armour, enchanted with various abilities and protection. There's a little more flesh on display than she would normally like with the armour's styling but the protection is in the right places and she uses a shield anyway. Her steel sword and shield seem a little poor now though.

Evening has come and she has a pot of food cooking, a pottage. Lydia is no 'Gourmet' but she does make a nice enough meal. Having gotten used to her new armour, she gives the stew a stir then a taste.

"Hm! Good! Though I say so myself. Wonder when my 'illustrious' thane is coming back? Oh, speak of the devil..." she says as she hears the door being opened.

Luxuria walks straight past her and up to her bedroom.

"Yes, I've had a lovely day, thanks for asking. I made some dinner if you'd... oh, why bother." she says to no-one.

"What? Did you say something?" Luxuria calls down.

"No, my thane. Nothing at all."

"Good. Keep the noise down. I'm going to sleep."

"Of course, my thane. And I hope you sleep... well?"

Luxuria has already gone again and Lydia hears the door slam.

_She is frustrating._

With little else to do, Lydia heads up the stairs to her own bed. Luxuria's door opens and she pops her head out uncovered, which Lydia has not seen yet. She is quite surprised. This previously mysterious looking figure is younger than she, probably Nord Lydia thinks, red headed, freckled and actually quite pretty, nothing at all like she would have expected.

"What did I just say about keeping the noise down?"

"Oh. I was just going to bed, my thane. Sorry if I disturbed you."

"Hm. Good."

And back in Luxuria goes, another slam of the door.

Nothing is turning out at all like Lydia had planned and despite being the strong warrior she is, she cannot help but have a little weep in her bed, feeling like her dream home as been gazumped and any dreams of seeing Skyrim dashed by the unfeeling child she must follow.


	4. Chapter 4

Lydia awakens in the morning, dresses in her simple peasant attire and heads downstairs. Luxuria is sitting by the fire, stirring it with the poker, just in thought, or so Lydia assumes. She can't think of anything else someone would be doing while stoking a fire but then, it would seem that her mistress is not like normal people. The sight of the Dragonborn is contrasting to her demeanour, with her long ginger locks and almost an innocence to her freckled face. Luxuria doesn't look at all like some kind of dark wizard, and sometimes more, just looking at the fire and poking it. However, upon seeing Lydia, Luxuria's brow furrows and the condescending snarl appears on her upper lip.

"Good morning, my thane."

"Hm." is all Luxuria responds.

"Would you like some breakfast?"

"Hm." she says in affirmation.

Lydia goes to the sack of oats to make some porridge, picks it up and the sack splits. Oats pour all over the floor.

"By the Nine!"

"What?"

"Oh the oats, don't worry, my thane, I'll clear it up."

"Not yet. What did you say?"

"Oh... nothing? The oats spilled out and..."

"You did not say nothing. What did you say?" Luxuria says with some aggression.

"By the Nine?"

"Are you one of those 'Skyrim belongs to the Nords' types? Hm? You support Ulfric? Barbarian pretender to the throne?"

"I... I think Skyrim should be able to decide its own destiny. You're a Nord, aren't you, my thane?"

"Don't remind me. Hm. Savages."

"Oh... that's a shame."

"What? It's a shame that I like the good things that life has to offer? Things that the Nords are too arrogant or dim to see? Like trade in and out? Luxury goods? Wealth? Bah! The Nords only know how to fight and drink. This is a dead region without the empire."

"I..."

"We're going to fight for the empire. If you have a problem with that, I'll slit your throat."

"I am sworn to you, my thane! Sworn to follow you in whatever you pursue. If we are to fight for the empire then... well... that's that really."

"Indeed. Good. The Breton's men will be here today. Do not disturb them. And cover those up, they don't need distractions."

"Of course, my thane." Lydia says, looking down at her unlaced chest then beginning to lace it up.

"I'm going out."

"If you have need of me, my thane, I am your sword and your shield." Lydia says, hoping she might be able to join her for some adventure, despite the fact the woman would probably be a pain the whole time. Regardless, it's her duty and she takes such things seriously. Luxuria pauses at the door and a melancholic look comes over her young face. Lydia feels empathy for the girl at this change in mood but isn't sure if there is anything she should say.

"Not... yet..." Luxuria says, a faint sorrow in her voice.

"Oh... er... okay. 'bye then!"

Luxuria leaves, slamming the door.

"How odd..."

* * *

The three workmen arrive in the late morning and begin installing kitchen, living area and bedroom furnishings, even an alchemy table for the small back room. Feeling like a spare wheel, Lydia offers her help and the men appreciate the extra pair of hands although not without a few lewd but good natured jokes at Lydia's expense regarding her feminine charms. She doesn't mind a bit of flattery so takes it well and offers them lunch when the time arrives. Once they finally leave in the late afternoon, their work done, Lydia sits on one of the new chairs in front of the fire.

"Whew! That was a good day's work. Makes a change to do something useful, if nothing else."

A few days pass without a return home from Luxuria and Lydia has just been pottering around the house, tweaking the décor to make it homely, almost forgetting this isn't actually her own home but it's nice to pretend for a while. On this morning, wind and rain swirl around outside, sounding quite rough out there. Lydia is examining the alchemy table when she hears the door.

"Hmm. Here we go then..." she mutters to herself, then goes to greet her mistress.

Luxuria is shaking the rain off her hood and there is something very different about her. Not just the new haircut, a stylish bob, but her demeanour and softer face, wearing some flattering make-up. She even looks relaxed. Luxuria takes off her cloak to reveal she is wearing a toughened leather Basque and thigh length boots then hangs it up. Her toned body carries the attire well.

"Wooo!" Luxuria says with a laugh and a natural, light voice. "It's wild out there, Lyd, I can tell you!"

"My thane?"

"Oh. Yes. Hm. Well. Sorry." Luxuria responds, with genuine intent and Lydia thinks she sees possibly even a little guilt.

"Are you... okay, my thane?"

"Well, Lyd, I've been having a few problems recently, hence the hood when I go out. Do I need to spell that out? But basically..."

Luxuria holds her hand out to Lydia, who takes it and they shake.

"Luxuria. Wizard and Dragonborn. Nothing more. Well, apart from being a demon with my knife when I need to."

Luxuria pulls out her dagger and thrusts a few times at an imaginary foe, with some added silliness as she shouts the occasional 'Hu! Ha!' and 'Have at ye!'".

"You're a... vampire...?"

"Was. Made a friend in Morthal and he helped me out."

"Oh my!"

"Yea. So. The empire."

"Yes, my thane?"

"We're not joining them."

"Oh?"

"As a vampire, I was only concerned with decadence. In the few days since I've been cured, I've had time to think properly, clearly. The empire are oppressors, end of."

"Really?"

"Yes. We'll head to Windhelm to see Jarl Ulfric soon, join the Stormcloaks. I am a Nord, after all!"

"That's... that's... wonderful news, my thane."

"Yes. I thought you might like that."

"But... my thane?"

"Yes?"

"Not that it's a bad thing but why have you cured yourself? Most vampires revel in the slaughter."

"Good question, Lyd. There's always the dark side of vampirism that no-one seems to speak of."

"What's that?"

"Oblivion."

"Not sure I follow."

"Dark souls go to Oblivion, and that's eternal damnation, even for a vampire. That's not something I wanted. But the cure might not be enough, I don't know. My soul may still be tainted, there's no way of knowing. So recently while I've been out investigating these dragons, I think I've found a way."

"Really?"

"Sovngarde."

"Sovngarde?"

"Yes. I have to get to Sovngarde to stop Alduin and in the process, secure a place there for my good deeds as Dragonborn. Once I realised that this is a possibility, I cured my vampirism to ensure that there would be no problems with the warriors who reside there. So basically, Lyd... I'm sorry I've been a horror."

"That sounds terrible for you! I'm not surprised you were so grumpy."

"By the Nine, eh?" Luxuria smiles, causing Lydia to laugh.

"I have to say though, my thane..."

"Lux."

"Oh. Thank you, my thane... I mean, 'Lux'. But I was just going to say, you are a very pretty girl, and your hair and make-up looks really nice. Where did you get the red for your lips?"

"Thanks! It's my own secret recipe. Snowberries and... well if I said any more I'd have to kill you." Luxuria says with deadpan humour until a smile spreads. "No. Seriously, I'll show you around the alchemy table at some point, show you how I make it and more if you like."

"Oh, my thane! That would be wonderful!"

"Yea, well. Oh!"

Luxuria goes to her hanging cloak with it's seemingly magic pockets, pulls out a sword and presents it to Lydia.

"For you, my housecarl."

"For me? But this is... Daedric?!" Lydia says, taking the sword and turning it as she holds it, studying its vicious, jagged edge, a shimmer of runes across the flat of the blade.

"Yes. I've enchanted it with fire so please, be careful. We wouldn't want to burn down this lovely home you've made for us now, would we?"

"No! And thank you!"

"Is the Ebony armour okay by the way? I know the styling is a bit... but are you okay with that? I think I probably chose that style on purpose just to... but now I'm okay, I just wanted to check."

"Well now you mention it... there is a little 'wobble' hanging down from under the breast plate. I didn't want to make a fuss..."

"No, no. Don't worry about me being funny about things any more. A bit prudish eh? You should have seen me when I was starting out as a vampire. I was so arrogant about my powers, I didn't wear armour. Well... if I'm truthful, I wore nothing but enchanted piercings."

"You went naked?!"

"Yea, I thought it was my 'thing', you know? Set me apart from the herd and create a little excitement. So I'd sneak around towns, picking locks to get into people's houses, getting off on just watching them sleep while I'm in the buff before... well you know. Pretentious bollocks really."

"That must have been quite a sight!"

"Hahaha! Yea, it probably was. I'll tell you what though, I reckon I could get from the city gates to Dragonsreach without being seen with all I learnt in those days. Even without the vampire powers."

"Really." Lydia says, her disbelief showing in her voice.

"You doubt me? This sounds like a challenge..."

"It's not a challenge if you wear enchanted armour."

"Oooooh. You want me to do it in my old style? Now that _is_ a challenge and you're on!"


	5. Chapter 5

Lydia and Luxuria have agreed the 'rules', with the added jeopardy of nakedness if she does get seen along the way. She will start on top of the guard barracks near the front gates, the fairest way they could think of as there are guards either side of the gates who would unavoidably spot a naked girl coming in. Luxuria must pickpocket the guard who stands at the city side of the gates to commence the game but under Lydia's duress she agreed to leave the purse behind him so it would appear he only dropped it. As such, Lux is allowed a belt for her dagger so she is able to purse-cut but will wear nothing more. They stand in front of Breezehome at dusk, Lux is dressed for the moment.

"You ready, then?" Lydia says, holding a satchel.

"Always." she replies as she heads to the barracks and stands at the bottom of the steps up. Once Brennuin passes her, no doubt heading to the Bannered Mare, she drops low, creeping quickly up the stairs and out of view.

Lydia looks on but not too obviously, so as not to attract other eyes looking to see what she is looking at. She has to temper her laugh when Lux suddenly leaps from the arch connecting to the barracks with not a sound and all her modesty on display. She sidles up to the guard in her low position unseen, sneaks behind him in the limited space that is there, a flash of her blade and she holds up the purse to show Lydia then places it gently behind him to maintain her stealth and off she goes, quite quickly past the barracks and up the stairs towards the residential area. Lydia casually walks that way, looking around as though just taking in the sights.

Carlotta and her daughter are slowly walking home and Lydia has to pass Lux as she is flat against the side of the house, waiting for them to enter before moving to her next cover.

"Evening, Lydia." Carlotta greets as Lydia passes them.

"Carlotta. Mila." she acknowledges and continues on her way, resisting the urge to look back to see what Lux is up to.

Lydia arrives at the circular rock garden between the houses of the Battle-Born family and Amren then waits, picking some heather to appear nonchalant. She looks towards the Gildergreen tree to see Luxuria circling it to keep the tree between herself and the guard pacing the area, then Lydia looks back in disbelief, trying to work out her route.

"How did she even...?" Lydia says to herself then continues her amble that way.

Again she has to temper her laugh as Lux occasionally holds her breasts to stop them swaying in her low position, attempting to minimise the slightest movement that might catch an eye. Once the guard has reached the stairs down to the market, Lux is off again towards the stairs to Dragonsreach itself. Lydia doesn't follow this time in case she attracts the attention of the guard and in turn, Lux, but she has a good view of the stairs so just watches out of the corner of her eye. Up the stairs Lux scoots, stealthy and silent.

"Now the tricky bit..." Lydia thinks.

Lux pauses when she reaches the top, not quite yet at the bridge over the moat, waiting for her moment. The guard turns to do his round towards the dungeon entrance and Lux runs to the castle door and touches it, then leaps the barrier to drop into the water below with barely a splash or a sound. Lydia continues now to meet her and give her something to wear from the satchel she has been carrying.

"You look tired, friend..."

"Not today, thank you." Lydia dismisses as she reaches the top of the stairs and heads around to the left to the short stairs down to the water's edge. Lux suddenly pops up, gasping for air, worrying Lydia.

"Are you okay?" she says quietly.

"Yea." she splutters. "Forgot about that. I can't breathe underwater any more. Swallowed a bit but I'm okay."

"Good. Here's a dress to wear."

Lux puts on Lydia's dress, which is big on her and the hem drags. They head back towards Breezehome.

"Well?" Lux says.

"Okay. Fair enough. I'm impressed and not just with the stealth." she says, with a raise of the eyebrows.

"Oh!" Lux says. "You bat for both teams or just the other side?"

"No... I just... well you're... you're a very attractive woman, Lux." Lydia says, quite embarrassed and thinking it would have been better to say nothing on this subject.

"Well you're not so bad yourself, Lyd. Those dark and mysterious charms that you have. And your big boobs!"

"Hmmm!"

* * *

Ivan stands at his post staring out across the beautiful aurora that has formed today. He steps back a little, re-positioning his feet to stop pins and needles forming and nearly trips as his foot meets his purse.

"Hm. How did that get there?" he says, confused then picks it up and wonders how the strap is broken but probably too dim to put two and two together.

Adrienne is at the stone wheel, sharpening a sword. She holds the sword up to check its blade.

"Guard might get nervous! A woman..."

"What?" Adrianne shouts back.

"I said, Guard might get nervous!"

"I can't hear you!"

Ivan wanders over to the Warmaiden's blacksmith.

"Guard might get nervous. A woman approaches with her weapon drawn."

"You approached me."

"Oh. No. I only came over because you didn't hear me."

"I wasn't going anywhere anyway. I was just sitting here minding my own business, sharpening it up for one of the boys, then you... Ugh, never mind. Just... go guard the gate, Ivan. Damn idiots!" she says with frustration at the general stupidity of all the guards.

"Okey-doke, Adri." He wanders back to his post, oblivious and returns to sky watching.


	6. Chapter 6

"Lyyyyyydiaaaaaaaaa." a soft voice sings.

Lydia stirs a little in her bed.

"Lyyyyyydiaaaaaaaaa." the voice calls again in a higher key, this time accompanied by a sweet aroma.

Lydia blinks her eyes then sees Lux grinning, kneeling at her bed, wafting the steam from a bowl of honeyed porridge at her.

"Oh. Good morning, my thane." she says, now sitting up.

"Made you some porridge."

"Why, thank you, my... Lux."

"Hm. 'My Lux'. That sounded kinda nice the way you said it. Anyway, eat that up for energy. Big day today. I'll see you downstairs in a mo." Lux says, passing her the bowl.

Lydia takes the bowl and tucks in while Lux goes back downstairs. It's very well made porridge. Not too stodgy, not too runny and just the right level of sweetness from the honey. She scrapes the dregs out with her spoon, sucks the last off it then yawns a big, stretching yawn before rising.

"Big day, eh? Better put some armour on then." Lydia says to herself, then looks at the Ebony armour. She puts on the chest plate and pulls it down as much possible, then taps herself underneath, feeling the 'wobble' she mentioned to Lux.

"Aw, I can't go out in this! The guards would have a field day! Luuux?!"

"Yea?"

"You know the Ebony armour?" she calls down.

"Yea?"

"Do I... can we...?" Lydia doesn't want to defy her duty to her thane.

"Oh! Okay! Just give me a minute then!" Lux calls back.

There is the sound of various items clashing about from the living area then the front door slams shut as Lux leaves the house.

"Hm. Was that a yes or a no?" Lydia ponders. "Well, I'd better get ready anyway. Maybe she'll let me borrow her cloak, at least to get through the town."

Lydia clips and fastens all the armour onto herself, buckles up the belt for her sword then with reverence, attaches the Daedric sword with a little pat on it afterwards.

"I think you and I are going to get along very nicely, Mister Flamey."

She goes downstairs then stands a moment, wondering where Lux has gone so sits by the fire while she waits. It is a good hour until Lux returns wearing her cloak and Lydia stands to begin her duties for her mistress' return.

"I am your sword and..."

"Lyd?" Lux interrupts.

"Yes, my thane?"

"I know I was quite nasty about it previously but really, you don't need to do all that. We're just people, you know? Lux is fine and the scripted greetings they have for you? I'm not so bothered. So just a 'Hi Lux! How you going?!' would do, okay?"

"But I am sworn to you, to give you the honour and respect due to a hero of the hold. It's my duty as your housecarl."

"Hm. Well if it makes you happy but don't feel obliged, okay?"

"Yes, Lux. Thank you. And it does make me happy, I've waited so long to have someone to follow, to perform the duties I've studied."

"Fair enough. Hm. I see what you mean now though." Lux says, studying the offending breast plate, then leans in to do what Lydia just tested herself with a little slap underneath.

"Yes..." Lydia says, tempted to slap her hand away but not wanting to appear aggressive with her mistress.

"Just as well I..." Lux produces new armour from under her cloak, "...made this for you!"

"Daedric! A Daedric sword and now Daedric armour?! Oh, my thane. You are too generous."

"Nah, with all the crap I've accumulated in my campaign, it's no biggie. I just popped over to Warmaiden's and whipped it up for you."

"You just smithed this, my thane?! You're very talented."

"Thanks! You have to be multi-talented to compete with all the other adventurers around. After leaving the woods where I grew up, my parents were hunters, then escaping Helgen, I learned all I could about not only smithing but magic, hand-to-hand, archery, alchemy, finding my way around enchanting tables, all kinds of skills that anyone wanting to find their fortune in Skyrim needs."

"You grew up in the woods? That must have been nice."

"Yea, it was." Lux says, a wistful look in her eye as she recalls it. "When I was really young, that's where I first started learning to be stealthy and quiet. You know, so I could get really close to the prey. Hehe, I was a bit of a free-spirit then. Like my vampire days, I didn't really wear... I always found that if I went natural, the beasts were less likely to smell me coming due to the unnatural smells of treated leather and whatnot."

"Are you a naturist?"

"Sometimes... if the mood takes me..." Lux says with a little wry smile. "Anyway, pop your armour on and we'll head out, eh?"

Lydia goes upstairs to change.

"You really are quite shy, aren't you, Lyd?" Lux calls up. "You could have just got changed down here, you know!"

"I'm sorry, my thane. I'm just not as free-spirited as you, I suppose!" Lydia calls back.

Happy that the new armour has full protection, not only from attacks with weapons but also from leering eyes, Lydia goes back downstairs.

"I preferred the other armour. You already have powerful shoulders. Not sure that armour is as flattering but you can carry it off I reckon." Lux assesses with a scratch of her chin.

"Thank you."

"Right!" Lux claps her hands. "Got everything?"

"Yes, my thane."

"Need the loo?"

"No, my thane?"

"Let's be off then!"

They leave the house and Lux indicates the direction, up towards the Wind District, talking as they walk.

"So what are we doing today, my thane?"

"Oh, you'll like this."

"Hm?"

"We're hopefully going to catch a dragon!" she says with all the naughtiness of a child.

"'Catch a dragon'?!" Lydia exclaims.

"Ha! Yea. Need to square it with the Jarl first. But so I've been told now by... a new friend... Dragonsreach has been used to do this before so I'm hoping it won't be too much of a hassle."

"You make it just sound like an inconvenience."

"The crap I've been dealing with recently, that's probably not far off the mark. Couldn't be any worse than Labyrinthian. That was a spooky place, I can tell you."

"I've passed through the ruins before. I know what you mean."

"You want to see it inside! All kinds of crazy shit in there. Lucky to get out alive, if I'm honest. Just as well I did or Winterhold might just be a hole in the ground right now, but that's another story."

"It's a shame really..."

"What's that?"

"Oh. Seems I've missed out on a lot. Sorry, my thane, but when you were umm... not yourself, I really wanted to get out for some adventure..."

"I used to be an adventurer..."

"Shut up, Stephan. Yea, so I really wanted to get out there but it sounds like I've been missing out on some serious fun."

"Yea, sorry about that. Hopefully I can make it up to you. There's no doubt still more treasures and powerful items out there to be found. I've got leads on a few. Promises of dark powers that no man should wield!" she says the last part with a ghostly voice. "Actually, once we get this dragon thing out of the way, I've got this other... 'thing' I found. 'Meridia's Beacon' I believe it's called. As soon as I touched it, the Daedric prince Meridia started talking to me. I say prince but she sounded more like a woman to me but she, he, it, thing wants me to clear out some temple for her. Or him. So we could go and do that at some point? Should be some good coin to be had, maybe the odd bit of nice loot. You up for that? Probably infested with draugr but aren't they all, eh?"

"I wouldn't know, my thane, but yes, that sounds like fun."

Now at the Dragonsreach castle, they enter. As they walk up towards the court, there seems to be an altercation happening between the Jarl, the steward Proventus and one of the guards. Lydia and Lux wait by the fire to be summoned for an audience.

"He harassed my daughter, the stupid idiot!" the steward is saying to the Jarl, quite petulantly.

"Calm down, Proventus! Let Ivan have his say." the Jarl responds.

"I was only following your orders, my Jarl." Ivan says.

"What? Which orders?"

Ivan pulls a parchment from his belt pouch, clears his throat and begins reciting.

"In order to maintain the peace, guards of the hold are to challenge anyone brandishing a weapon, using the phrase, 'Guard might get nervous. A man/woman approaches with his/her weapon drawn', thereby letting the offender know that the guards are aware and discouraging disorder."

He steps up to try and show the specific instruction to the Jarl, pointing at the particular line. Jarl Balgruuf slaps the parchment from his hand.

"You idiot!" the Jarl shouts, dumbfounded by what he is hearing. "That doesn't mean... she was only... you don't go... agh! Get out of my sight!"

"Shall I just stand behind a pillar then, my Jarl?"

"Irileth! Irileth!" the Jarl shouts, his face becoming more red with frustration.

"Yes, my Jarl?"

"Get this fool out of here!"

"Yes, my Jarl." she replies, then approaches Ivan to guide him away like a mother might guide a lost child. "Come on, Ivan!"

"Oh. Hello, Irileth. You looks nice today. Jarl's a lucky man!"

"Ivan..." she puts her arm around him as she leads him out, "remember what I said about speaking before thinking?"

"You wish to speak with me, Dragonborn." the Jarl says once his rage has cooled.

Lydia continues standing by the fire while Lux conducts her business. The Jarl is uncomfortable with her mistress' request but they seem to come to an agreement. Once they have concluded their conversation, the guard at the Jarl's flank speaks briefly with Lux as they occasionally look towards Lydia. Lux walks back to the fire to speak with her housecarl.

"Not quite to plan but he's willing to help. And I believe I'm going to make your day from what Igor just said."

"Oh?"

"I need to speak with the Greybeards."

"Does that mean..?"

"Yup! The seven thousand steps!"


	7. Chapter 7

"Going up the seven thousand steps today, Klimmek?" the optimistic Bosmer, Gwilin, asks.

"Nah, no need. The Dragonborn took some supplies up for me. I'm good for a few days yet."

Klimmek and Gwilin stand on the bridge in the town of Ivarstead which leads to the Seven Thousand Steps, just passing the time with conversation.

"Must be dangerous going up there, if only from the icy stone steps and a nasty fall."

"Just the occasional wolf."

"Oh! Here's your new friend now!"

Lydia and Lux are approaching them.

"I wanted words with this guy." Lux says to Lydia out of the side of her mouth.

"You've been a good friend to me. That means something." Klimmek says to Lux as they arrive.

"Really..." Lux says, crossing her arms and standing defensively.

"Uhh... yea. You took some supplies up to High Hrothgar for me."

"Indeed. And what did you say to me?"

"Uhh... the Greybeards know the way of the Thu'um?"

"And..?"

"Uhh..." Klimmek responds, unsure of the accusation or if there is indeed one.

"You said, 'wolves'. 'Oh there's only the occasional wolf', he says. By the Nine!"

"What?"

"I didn't get up the first few hundred steps and a bear leapt out at me. A bear!"

"Oh."

"Then. Then! Two ice wraiths, followed by a frost troll, more bears, a frost spider and then, and only then, finally! A wolf. One. Single. Wolf!"

"I've never had any trouble with..."

"Oh don't talk rot. That frost troll had made his lair years ago."

"Really? Can't say I've ever noticed."

"Agh, I can understand now why I thought the way I did about the Nords when I was a vampire."

"What?"

"Never mind, Klimmek. Just in future, if anyone's going up there? You tell them, 'Be careful! There's damn near every type of beast in Skyrim up there!' Ugh, come on, Lyd!"

"Right behind you, my thane."

The bemused pair on the bridge watch the Dragonborn and her follower walk away towards the Seven Thousand Steps.

"That was weird." Klimmek says.

"You never noticed this troll's lair she spoke of?"

"No! Never."

"Hm."

Even Gwilin's optimistic outlook is dimmed as he finds himself agreeing with Lux's implied assessment of the Nords.

* * *

"What? We just walked all the way up here, had to fight off all those stupid beasts, and now you're just going to stand outside?!" Lux says to Lydia.

"Well... yes! I've made the walk, meditated on the blessings, I'm happy just to wait for you, my thane."

"Are you superstitious about the Greybeards or something?"

"They are most eminent persons. I wouldn't know what to say!"

"Oh they're just old, beardy blokes in robes. And the way they look at me? I reckon they'd love to meet you!"

"I'm fine, my thane. I'll just wait here."

"Okay then. Your choice. But take my cloak at least. It's getting quite windy out here now."

"That's okay, I don't really feel the cold."

"Take it anyway. Give the old boys something to gawk at, eh?" she says with a cheeky smile.

Lux takes off her cloak and passes it to Lydia, adjusts her Basque to form an impressive cleavage then looks down at it.

"Alright, you reckon?" she asks Lydia.

"Umm... yes! If that's what you're going for."

"Good! See you in a mo!"

* * *

After her meeting with the Greybeards, Lux and Lydia are returning to Ivarstead town in the evening, just strolling back across the bridge.

"Never bloody simple these things!" Lux rants. "Up the mountain, down the mountain, over to here, over to there, kill this thing, fetch that thing, do this, do that! I don't know why I bother sometimes! Do I get thanks? Does anyone really care? I'm the damn Archmage of the College of Winterhold! Does that get me respect? Does it? No! That Altmer, Nirya, she just cringes and fawns around me while the rest just want me to do their bidding or something while they have petty squabbles! Nice pad at the college though, we should go hang out there some time."

"Your duties must be a burden at times, my thane."

"I'm not complaining. Well okay, I am but... arranging and chairing a summit between Ulfric and General Tullius? I'm not sure I'm up for that kind of thing."

"You are most charming, my thane. I think you would do better than most. And with your reputation as Dragonborn, surely all will listen to your wise counsel?"

"Awww, that's really sweet, Lyd. Thanks! Anyway, it's getting late. Let's just get a mead or two in the Vilemyr Inn here and get silly, eh? May as well stay the night here as well, no point heading anywhere now."

"That sounds nice, my thane."

"Oh Lyd. I do really wish you'd loosen up a little. Let's see what a few meads do to you, eh?"

"I can take my mead, don't you worry about that."

"Another challenge..?"

"I'm not sure we should. As you say, we've a lot to do tomorrow."

"Fair enough but that challenge needs to be met sometime."

They arrive at the tavern and Lux offers her housecarl the door and Lydia pauses.

"Oh after you, my thane."

"Ugh, okay then, uptighty woman."

The tavern is quite empty, with only Wilhelm the tavern owner, a bard and one patron.

"This place is deeeaaad." Lux comments.

"Would you like to hear me play my lute, m'lady?" the bard, Lynly Star-Sung, asks Lux.

"Oooh, m'lady, eh? Nice. Yea, sure! But, please, none of those depressing ones about the Dragonborn or the war."

"Of course, m'lady."

Lynly plays a lively jig while Lux and Lydia get themselves settled at a table with a tankard of mead each from Wilhelm. Lux throws back her drink, spilling some over her chin and down her front, laughs at her own clumsiness, then chugs back some more.

"The sit down is nice after all that walking." Lydia comments.

"You said it, Lyd! My feet are burning up here. I'm taking these boots off. Give me a hand will you?"

Lux points at foot at Lydia, who heaves off the thigh-length boot.

"Uuuh, that's better. Now the other one, if you would please, Lydiaaa."

Lydia obliges again.

"Aaah! So. Another round, Wilhelm!"

"You've finished that one already?"

"I was thirsty from the walk! Wimp."

"Oh no. You're not dragging me into a drinking contest like that."

"Can't blame a girl for trying. But this is a catchy number." Lux is tapping her hand on her thigh in time to the music, then all of a sudden jumps up and begins skipping and dancing around the tavern fire to the tune, her bare feet slapping on the stone floor.

Lydia laughs at the spontaneity of the free-spirited girl and claps in time with the music. Once she completes another circuit, Lux holds out her hands to Lydia.

"Come on, Lyd!"

"Oh no, my thane. I'm not much of a dancer."

"Oh come ooon! Dance with me!"

Lux takes her hands and starts pulling her out of her chair and once Lydia is stood, twirls and spins around in front of her. It is quite infectious and Lydia cannot help but begin letting her body move to the rhythm of the music and her friend.


	8. Chapter 8

Luxuria the Dragonborn needs to arrange the summit with Ulfric Stormcloak and General Tullius so she and Lydia have headed to the capital city of Solitude. They arrive in the afternoon and enter through the city gates.

"I hope it's a bit more welcoming than last time I visited." Lux says.

"What happened?"

"Execution. Typical stuff. Stupid guardsman let the whole Ulfric thing happen, basically started the war. I really don't get why the Jarls don't vet their guards more thoroughly. I mean, Jarl Elisif doesn't seem stupid or anything but, hey! What do I know?!"

"You look tired, friend. You see Hulda at the Bannered Mare, she's got cold mead and warm beds." a guard says at them and the girls both stand looking at him, slightly stunned until Lux finally speaks.

"You know this is Solitude, right?"

"Oh! One moment, please." he replies holding up a finger then pulls out a parchment from his pouch and starts murmuring to himself as he reads.

"Oh I see now! I've been practising from the wrong column again. Where's Solitude on here... Ummm... which one...? Here we go!"

He clears his throat.

"Guard might get nervous. A woman approaches with her weapon drawn."

"We... don't have any weapons drawn?" Lydia says.

The guard looks at Lydia then Lux, seemingly double checking that they don't have any weapons drawn, then returns to his sheet.

"Let's see then... Here's a good one! Heard about your honeyed... words? Oh. Ah well, I'll get the next ones."

Lux and Lydia enter the Winking Skeever bar for a drink after their long cart ride here, the city being in the north-westerly most area of Skyrim. It's quite busy with locals and adventurers, and they seat themselves at a table in the main lounge. A blonde Breton bard girl steps up to commence a song, 'The Dragonborn Comes'.

"I should be flattered but those dirges get on my tits." Lux says.

"They are quite slow paced, I would have to agree. But I would be honoured if someone wrote a song about me. Well... as long as it wasn't Mikael the bard over at the Bannered Mare."

"You know Mikael the bard?" the bard suddenly demands, stopping mid-song with a clanging chord.

"Oh! Yes, he sings in Whiterun." Lydia replies.

"So that's where the scoundrel is. Just wait 'til I tell Erdi." the bard says, now somewhat irate.

Lux and Lydia look at each other with raised eye-brows, unsure what just happened.

"Sorry." the bard continues. "I'm Lisette, bard here at the Winking Skeever."

Lydia bursts out laughing then calms herself.

"Yes. I've heard of you. And from what I hear, it's not just the Dragonborn who comes." she adds as she brings her tankard up to her own.

"Agh! He's doing that bloody song in Whiterun now?" Lisette shouts.

"The men all seem to like it..."

"I'll bet they do. They're all filthy beasts! Right! I'm going to see Erdi at the Blue Palace. She and I are going to Whiterun to have 'words' with that... that... agh!" Lisette says, then storms out of the tavern.

"Nice one, Lyd. You're not just sweetness and light after all." Lux says.

Lydia allows herself a smirk.

* * *

With the summit with General and Ulfric concluded as well as it could be in the circumstance and a ceasefire established, Lux and Lydia have returned to Whiterun, hoping that the temporary ceasefire will be enough to convince Jarl Baalgruf to let Lux catch her dragon. They arrive back at Breezehome as she wants to change her gear. As soon as in the house, Lux strips herself and Lydia turns away.

"You watched me stealth naked across Whiterun and now you're embarrassed?"

"I only wish to respect dignity, my thane."

"Ha! Dignity? I used to run around in public naked! I'm Luxuria, the Wizard Vampire Bandit! I don't think I even know what the word 'dignity' means."

Lydia laughs to herself a little at Lux's self-title.

"But I'm glad that worked out the way it did though with the summit. Old Maven'll be happy anyway, she's bound to be the replacement Jarl, she virtually runs Riften anyway. She's not a bad old stick once you get to know her. Even came to my inauguration as Guild Master. Maven just doesn't suffer fools gladly. She'll have to enjoy it while she can though. If we do join the Stormcloaks, they're going to want Riften back. Well hopefully they'll just exile her or something, I wouldn't want to see her dead. One the other hand, with her influence? She'll probably ride it out and still be rolling in clover. Her sort usually do."

"You're very well travelled and experienced, my thane."

"Stop being so officious, you're pathetic." Lux hisses.

"Oh! I... I'm sorry, my thane."

"Ha! Gotcha!"

"Don't do that!"

"Sorry, Lyd. Couldn't resist. Well?" Lux says, indicating she has completed her change.

Lydia turns around to she is wearing a white, small and tight fitting vest top and pants, with matching white gloves and boots, and switched to a katana style sword with a twisted snake hilt. She's also tied her hair up, which Lydia does think looks quite cute with the get up.

"Nice eh? Thought I'd go with the whole white knight kinda thing. I am supposed to be some kind of hero, after all. May as well look the part, eh?"

"I'm not sure I've ever seen a knight wearing anything quite like that, my thane, but that's a nice looking sword."

"Yea. Little present left behind by the Blades, should come in handy on this venture. Anyway, need anything before we head up? Not sure what to expect from this dragon in all this. Paathunax seemed to think he'd have something for us anyway."

"Who?"

"Oh... just a friend. Talking of which... I wanted to apologise. I said yesterday that no-one gives me respect and all this time I've been ticking you off for doing just that. I just wanted to say, that, you know, I don't see you like them. You're more like my friend than just a skivvy. I hope that came out right?"

"No, I'm honoured, really, and I'm pleased. I see you as a friend too. I just want to do my duty as best I can so I'm sorry if it offends you, my thane."

"No! I'm not offended and I know your dedicated to your work, Lyd. Don't mind me. I can still be a grumpy bugger sometimes. That was in me long before my vampirism, if I'm honest."

"If you don't mind me asking, my thane, how did you become a vampire?"

"Not my finest hour. I went willingly to a vampire hideout. I thought it'd be cool and make me interesting. While it was fun at first, sneaking into people's houses and all that, the rumours of the Dawnguard started going around and I had to consider that they'd be coming for all vampires eventually. Then the Oblivion problem occurred to me and whether there was a way out for me. Yea, so... once I found out about Alduin hiding out in Sovengaard, I had to try this. Was all around the time I met you actually. Sorry about all that."

"There's no need. You've already apologised, my thane."

"Like I've said before, it was all just pretentious bollocks really 'til the Dawnguard came along. Anyway! Let's catch us a dragon, eh?!"

"Yes, my thane!"

* * *

Lydia stands at the battlements of the Great Porch where they will catch their prey, her sword and shield in her hands, preparing her mind for the coming battle. She finds her mind wandering, the last few days having been wonderful for her. Getting out of the house, walking the Seven Thousand Steps and fighting a few beasts on the way up, visiting new and interesting places, the fun time they had in Ivarstead when they danced the night away, she really feels she has found a place in Skyrim, despite not ever getting her little piece of Whiterun. She might not actually own Breezehome but it certainly feels like home. Odd as it is to her, Luxuria the Wizard Vampire Bandit was the one who made it that way.

One guard stands with Lydia while the rest just mill around while the Jarl and his housecarl, Irileth, wait towards the back of the Great Porch. Two guards are prepared to drop the trap once Lux has lured the dragon in, they all hope, assuming she can indeed perform such a task.

Lux walks to the battlement, with a seriousness Lydia hasn't seen before.

"You might be my sword and my shield, Lyd, but you best get behind me for this one."

"Oh. As you wish, my thane."

Lux stands at the edge, looks out across the vast plane towards the snow frosted mountains ahead then takes a deep breath.

"OH-DAH-VIING!" the thu'um flows from her powerful voice as she cries out the dragons name to tease him into coming to look.

Her voice echoes across the land and all must have heard it. A short wait and indeed, at least the dragon seems to have as they hear his roar. The guard still waiting at the battlements looks around.

"Was that a noise?" he ponders, but not for long.

The dragon swoops down, collects him up in his mouth and glides off again, eventually tossing the unfortunate away and no doubt to his doom.

"Plenty more where that came from!" the Jarl jokes, making the other guards more nervous than they already were.

The dragon comes swooping in again, directly towards the Great Porch, the guards firing pointless arrows at it, until it lands on the battlements with a mighty thud, booming around the porch, dust swirling around him. Lux casts a spell to protect herself from fire and just in time, as the dragon pours forth it's fiery breath, fighting to stand as its mighty Thu'um crash against her. She just slowly backs up as he follows her, allowing the flames to wash over herself, protected by her magics and enchantments, until she shouts.

"Now!"

The guards pull on their levers and the collar trap comes crashing down on the dragon, holding him in place. He tries to struggle free but quickly realises he is stuck fast then calms, just his strong, deep breathing filling the porch with sound. Lydia is amazed as Lux just walks right up to him to begin a conversation. Their exchange done, Lux let's the Jarl know her plans. Before leaving the Jarl and his housecarl, Lux turns to Irileth.

"Irileth?"

"Yes?"

"I'm the Dragonborn. It ain't superstitious nonsense. So deal with it and lose the attitude."

"Really!" Irileth responds as she looks to the Jarl for support, somewhat taken aback by Lux's forthrightness.

The Jarl just laughs.

"Irileth, you still doubt it?"

Irileth just folds her arms with a humph then the Jarl goes to inform the guards of the Dragonborn's plans. Lux turns and walks to Lydia.

"Hey, Lyd."

"My thane! That was... I've never seen anything like it! And your Thu'um!"

"Yea, yea, all in a day's work for the Dovakhiin. But anyway. Lyd. Lydia. I don't know what I'm about to face or if even if I'm going to make it back so... I wanted to give you something."

"I am sworn to..."

"...to carry my burdens, I know. So anyway, please, take this. Just a token of my appreciation for everything you've put up with. But... don't look 'til I've gone, okay?"

She hands Lydia a velvet jewellery bag, then holds onto her hands.

"Come 'ere, Lyd. My wonderful housecarl."

She pulls her in for a strong hug then stands back with little wrinkle to the nose from her smile, Lydia thinks possibly even a little misty eyed.

"Well! I have to go."

"Where to, my thane?"

"Sovngarde!"

"How?"

"Believe it or not, my new friend here's going to give me a lift. Oh yea, just a sec. Let him go, boys!" she shouts at the guards.

The trap releases and the dragon turns around then thuds his way down to the open battlements. Lux walks backwards away from Lydia towards where he waits, grinning but a little coy.

"No peeking now! Not 'til I've gone, okay?"

"No, my thane. Of course. And good luck!"

Lux faces the dragon with her hands on her hips.

"We ready, Mr Dragon?" she shouts.

"Dovahkiin, I am ready when you are." his voice booms.

Lux climbs a wing and leaps onto his neck enthusiastically then he begins to pump his wings and they slowly rise.

"By the Nine!" Lydia says.

"This is great! See you in a mo, Lyd!" Lux shouts then the dragon swoops away.

The housecarl watches as her free-spirited friend flies away, evidently enjoying the ride, which looks terrifying to Lydia. She hopes for the best, not just for Skyrim but that Lux will return safely. Lydia pulls the velvet bag's drawstrings open and looks in, then looks back up at the shrinking dragon with Luxuria on its back, then back in the bag, her jaw dropping a little in disbelief.

"Is that an amulet of Mara?!" Lydia says as she hears the speck in the distance cry out on the wind.

"Lyyydiaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!"

* * *

_"Wizard Vampire Bandit" line 'appropriated' from the RageNineteen's excellent video An Arrow In The Knee on YouTube. Well worth a look for us Skyrim 'in joke' lovers._


End file.
